Labored Countertransference

Jennifer Wolkin



There is no way you could have known

your news that day would juxtapose 

 

with mine.

 

I’m no blank slate but self-disclosure 

is an art

 

& I paint gently

 

so that your news of an accidental

pregnancy

 

is nurtured & held while I hold my 

own loss—

 

news of 

empty ovaries—

 

burying it

for a gestational period of 45-minutes—

 

my time to grieve begins 

when I close the door behind you

 

falling to my knees from 

the heavy weight of emptiness

 

like a boulder on my bosom 

where I dreamed my baby 

 

would be.

 


Dr. Jennifer Wolkin is a health and neuro psychologist, speaker, mental health advocate, and mindfulness-meditation practitioner.  She just started her MFA in creative writing and literary translation at Queens College, and couldn't be happier about pursuing this dream. She has recently been published and is stoked about humbly sharing her voice. Jennifer is most passionate about writing at the intersection where the mind, body, brain and spirit meet—about the holistic human experience—through the eyes of both her own experiences and through her professional lens. She is touched by the profound pain that is both individually and collectively felt, how this pain can displace someone from others and their/our own selves, and yet, the profound capacity for resilience, healing, and growth. She is on twitter.

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